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Knowing the answer prevents later heartbreak. Sometimes this dance lasts minutes, and sometimes it lasts months or years. Of course, we try to make our intentions known, but we often fail. Neither does never being the one to text first, or liking other girls' Insta pics, or bringing up your ex constantly although that is definitely an effective way to prevent serious relationships. I once had a friends with benefits whom I never kissed on the mouth. I think it was a subconscious effect of Pretty Woman.

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It just sort of happened. In discussing this topic with my female friends, it seems to me that men are especially experienced in dealing with this dilemma. Say a friend of mine breaks up with so-and-so, and we run into her at a party. In some ways this is perfectly natural. This sort of stuff happens more than you might think.

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There's this guy who I've always kind of had a friends with benifits thing with, but now that he has a girlfriend, I backed off and I treated him as my friend again. This guy is my best friend's brother, and she told me that he told her that he loved this girl, that he really cared for her and they had an amazing connection. So I don't understand why he hooked up with me again last time I was over at their place. He initiated it. He kissed me first.

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