As Certified Relationship Coaches, we often get an inbox on our website asking us for the politically correct answer, what are the rules? Overall, we agree it is a case-by-case situation and you should tread lightly. Ask yourself, is it worth the risk? Follow Us. Skip to content. Is this a childhood friend or someone you consider a best friend or sister?
As Certified Relationship Coaches, we often get an inbox on our website asking us for the politically correct answer, what are the rules?
10 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Decide To Date a Friend's Ex
Overall, we agree it is a case-by-case situation and you should tread lightly. Ask yourself, is it worth the risk?
Follow Us. Skip to content. Is this a childhood friend or someone you consider a best friend or sister?
I married my friends ex. Loved her from the day we met but NEVER acted on it while they were a couple. I didn't want ask her out at first because he did get hurt when we started dating. But I knew if I didn't I would always regret not at least giving it a shot. He hasn't talked to me since. Still married 5 years later. Have one child and a. Jun 14, Sometimes dating your friend's ex is all good, and sometime it's really not. Ask yourself these 10 questions before you go there. There appears to be an "unspoken" rule or . Aug 31, Sean Locke. If your partner is still "dating" their ex, then yeahhhh, that's a no-no."If your partner has regular dates with an ex, and they Author: Alison Segel.
Would you be devastated if she never spoke to you again? Is your friend happy in her new relationship and has long moved on? If this ex was someone that was a fling, a relatively short-term relationship and not the former love of her life, we would say proceed and see where things go Can you imagine if one of them is thinking in the back of their mind that they would be open to trying again if their current circumstances were different, i.
A good question to ask is how did the relationship end and would either of them ever be open to trying again?
A tough question but you really need to know the answer. Which is that people never really get over significant romantic relationships. Not really. I don't mean that you can never be happy again after breaking up with someone.
Of course you can. But it's largely a matter of compartmentalizing. You get a new and even prettier girlfriend, or hang out with your friends more, or get into jiu jitsu or knitting.
r/AskReddit People Share Why They No Longer Speak With Their Former Best Friend
You get a new life so you don't spend all your time sitting around and crying about your old one like the baby you are. Sure, people will talk about their old relationships and say that they're "over it" or that it "wasn't meant to be," or pepper you with other related nonsense phrases, but what they mean is they're not thinking about it right now.
All of those old wounds stick around, just waiting to be re-opened. You're always going to feel weird when you see your ex, at least a little bit.
Is It Ever OK To Date Your Friend's Ex?
If you're still friends with your exit wasn't that serious, or it's still serious. And, if you date your friends' ex, you're telling your friend that your romantic feelings are more important than their happiness. Because they're going to see you holding hands with their ex, and remember how nice that felt, and if you think they won't envision you having sex together, you're being naive. Of course, that's going to hurt. Inherently, it's a selfish thing. You're saying, "screw you and your silly emotions, I've got to get laid.
Does this mean you should never, ever date a friend's ex? Well, actually, no.
Dating a friends ex girlfriend reddit
It means that it's a bad idea, but that's not the same as "never do it. It's possible that you've got an uncommon romance on your hands. Maybe this is your future wife, or muse, or whatever it is that you're looking for. If this is the case, you'd be missing out on years of potential passion if you passed up on this girl for the sake of sparing your friends' feelings. Like I said, this is a tough one.
You've got a hell of a decision to make. Accordingly, you should treat this like any other important decision, which is to say that you should get as much information as possible.
First, be real with yourself. Is this girl really special to you? Is there actually an uncommon reaction between you - some sort of deep compatibility that's worth alienating your friend for? Or is she just an attractive person who finds you attractive, too?
Those two things are so, so easily confused. Approach these questions with the maximum possible skepticism about yourself.
If you feel fluttery every time you talk to a pretty girl, keep that in mind. If you're currently lonely and you really need to get laid, consider that maybe you're just desperate. And dwell on the fact that some of your excitement might just come from the taboo nature of this potential relationship, because, like everyone else, you want what's off-limits.
If I were a betting man, I'd bet that your crush on this girl is just like any other crush. It's a fun illusion, which, if pursued, might reveal a great relationship, or might not. Odds are, that's what this is, in which case you should probably just sigh, move on, and hit up your online dating site of choice, where you can find lots of other crush-worthy women.
I found out about this the hard way, in a similar situation.
Tom, one of my childhood friends, was always kind of bummed out, until he met Josie, a fast-talking, high-energy woman who brought him out of his shell. They had a sparkling relationship - they were one of those couples that just radiated warm, gooey, nauseating passion - and I was super envious of it. Also, obviously, Josie was an outrageously foxy person: one of those girls where it feels like your eyeballs are being manipulated.
There was only one weird thing about her, which is that I would occasionally catch her looking at me a little funny. I suspected that she had a low-key crush on me.
May 25, This is a tough one, because dating a friend's ex is one of the most essential dating taboos. " Don't date your ex " is right up there with "don't break up . Ex. 1: You like a girl who is the long term girlfriend (1 year, PR 4) of your best mate (FR 5). He's told you to keep your fucking hands off (AF = 2), she broke it off (RF = 1) and they've been broken up a year (of the time elapsed, TE = ). Nov 12, You need to talk this out with her. Both of you know your friend well, from different points of view, and together you will be able to come up with an honest way of telling him so that he will not be angry or hurt. Once you've had that conversation with your friend's ex, you'll need to sit down with him.
About a year after she dumped Tom abruptly, leaving him a sniveling wreck, I discovered that I was correct.